Bfe^s 





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COMEDY. 



(WITH SONG.) 



BY 



Carl Theodore Hanson. 



[fR03I the vaudeville " LIDT FORSTYRELSE PA A FAR- 
MEU/' BY JOHN HEINSE.] 




V3, 

PRINTED FOR THE AUTHOR. 

1887. 









Entered According to Act of Congress, in the Year 1887, 

By Carl Theodore Hanson, 

In the Office of the Librarian of Congress, at Washington. 



TMP96-0070S4 



DRAMATIS PERSONS. 

JOHNSON, A Rich Norwegian Farmer in Wisconsin. 

LOUISA OLSON, his Niece from Bergen. 

HENRY LIND, a Young Danish Physician. 

BRORSON, A Young Norwegian Doctor from Chicago. 

QUESTRUP, A Danish Lawyer from Chicago. 

JOHN ERlCHSON, a Norwegian Farmer. 

MARTIN, A Norwegian.") t^„ ..^..»o c^^t., *xt.-o 
ANNA, A Danish Girl. [ Johnson's SER^ ants. 

PLACE OF ACTION: 

JOHNSON'S FARM IN WISCONSIN. 



DISTURBAT^CE OJ^ THE FARM. 



Scene 1. 

(It is a fine summer day. The stage exhibits an open space in front 
of the farm house. House at the right. Two small wooden steps 
lead to two doors; the one nearest the audience is a glass door, the 
other leads to Johnson's own apartment. From the house to the 
background extends a fence in which are two gates; through the one 
near house entrance is had to yard; through the other at the farther 
end of fence, to the woods in background. Near the glass door is a 
table with a white spread over it, on which stands a coffee-service, a 
dish of cookies, Louisa's sewing, and a photograph-album. A flower- 
pot containing a white rose in bloom is seen near steps leading to 
glass door.) 

Johnson. Louisa. 

(Johnson sitting in a rocker reading a newspaper.) 
(Louisa stands near table at the right turning the leaves of a book 
containing Norwegian scenes.) (She sings) : 

See how in the evening sun on mountain top 
Gracefully the pines toward Heaven reaches up, 
II : And the narrow path around the ledge I spy — 
Merrily the brook goes gurgling by. :|| 

Every tree and house thus seen — where e'er I roam — 
Brings the soul in flight back to its childhood's home, 
II : Oh, where mother rests behind the dark blue sea. 
Dying, I would mostly like to be ! :|| 

Pretty everywhere the Heaven's blue, I ween, 
Everywhere the tree's fresh foliage is green, 
II : But — like you, my Norway, not a place I know. 
Is so pretty on God's earth below ! :|| 



b DISTURBANCE ON THE FARM. 

Johnson {throws newspaper on the ground), I had in- 
dulged the hope that we finally would have peace here in 
the country, but no ! {Rises and paces to and fro,) 

Louisa. What's the matter, dear uncle? (/>«.ys hool: 
on table,) 

Johnson. What's the matter? (Stoops to pick up the 
paper,) It is this — that — but read it yourself! 1 can't bear 
to read such stuff more than once ! There — {Pointing to item 
in paper,) — there it stands in large, fat types! {Lights a 
clay pipe,) 

Louisa. {Reads,) -^If a young and talented Scandina- 
vian physician would locate in this vicinity, he would un- 
doubtedly soon acquire a good practice. Any such is re- 
quested to address the undersigned, Avho will furnish further 

desired information. John Erichson, county, AVis." 

{Putting paper aside,) But, dear uncle, I really can't un- 
derstand 

Johnson {excited). You don't understand? Well, that's 
another thing ! Can't you comprehend that if we are to have 
one of these humbugs here all peace and quiet in the country 
will be at an end? 

Louisa. Dear uncle, — no ! Don't get excited — but I 
must confess that I hail with delight the prospect of being 
able to receive medical treatment when needed, and we can't 
but feel grateful to Mr. Erichson for having occasioned it. 

Johnson {dashing the clay pipe to the ground), John 
Erichson is an old fool, and you a little goose, Louisa, that 
talk as light as the Avind ! Having now for so many years 
lived healthy and contented, Avith God's blessing hereabouts, 
without any need of humbugs, it strikes me that we can 
dispense with that article in future. What? 

Louisa. Good, dear old uncle, there is no one who desires 
it should be a patent-medicine doctor! {Laughs,) On the 
contrary ! Mr. Erichson advertises for a talented physician 
and not a humbug. 

Johnson {laughs). Not a humbug ! Well, indeed ! No, 
my pet, there is no such article among the medical men ! 
Not a humbug ! Indeed ! They are a fine flock of birds, all 
of them ! Not a humbug ! ha ! ha ! ha ! 

Louisa. For shame, uncle ! You ought not to apply such 
sentiments to all alike ! Do you call that just? Is there not 



DISTURBANCE ON THE FARM. 7 

hundreds of doctors of whom it would be a blessing if one 
could come here? I know 

Johnson. You know an old hat ! I can't understand, 
Louisa, how you can talk such nonsense ! There was Aunt 
Caroline in Bergen, who in every thing else was your model ; 
didn't she herself write that if the attending physician had 
not bled your mother she would never have died ? 

Louisa. It's both sin and shame for you and Aunt Caro- 
line to talk so ! The doctor did what he could, and 

Johnson. Ha ! ha ! ha ! Yes, what he could ! But the 
difficulty was he couldn't do anything ! He was a humbug ! 
Ha! ha! ha! 

Louisa. If 

Johnson. O, may I beg to be spared the ^'If "? I con- 
fine myself to facts! Who was it, do you suppose, killed 
Peter? He was my best harvest hand ! And then, besides, 
it happened in the middle of busy harvest time ! 

Louisa. Good God, uncle 

Johnson. No, the good God would never have thought of 
sending for Peter just then ! Don't mix the Lord in that ! It 
was the doctor alone that did that job ! 

Louisa. How could the doctor be to blame for Peter's 
drinking the whole bottle off at once ? He had both said and 
written : 10 drops every 3 hours. 

Johnson. The devil he had ! And even if he had, some- 
thing I yet doubt very much, it was of course scribbled in 
that infernal doctor-Latin which no decent christian can read. 
Perhaps, too, that Dr. Calvin, who defrauded me of $5000 
and thereby compelled me to leave house and home in Europe, 
had both said and written that they were to be taken in 
drops? No, my girl, the whole business Avent up in smoke 
at once ! 

Louisa. I have no perfect knowledge of that affair, but — 

Johnson. But still you must have your say, like a little 
goose, about something you know nothing about. No — 
{lights a cigar), — no, I have my reasons, and they are solid 
I'd have you know ! 

Louisa. Yes, if you call such reasons solid, then 

Johnson. Goodness-gracious me ! Of course I call them 
solid ! Have you anything to urge against them perhaps ? 
Just look at Martin, now at work in the field on two sound 



» DISTURB ANCE ON THE EARM. 

legs ; if he hadn't objected by screaming murder, then these 
— these cannibals would have cut his leg off last autumn when 
it was damaged in the threshing machine ! No, no I Don't 
come to me Avith your modifications, 'cause I'll annihilate 
every one! All! (Puts lighted end of cir/ar in his mouth,) 
Auw ! (^Expectorates) . 

Louisa. (Laughs.) There, you see what comes of 
^ettinof excited. 

Johnson. Well, I suppose 1 have a riglit to get excited 
in my own house, when I find occasion ! Besides, Louisa, 
you ought to understand better how to 

Louisa (putting her arms around his neck) . Ought to 
understand better how to humor uncle, and not help him to 
be crusty ! Be (kissing him) sensible now, and come 

Johnson. No ! I won't be sensible ! I am awful angry ! 
I should already have been out in the field — I should have 
had the contract with the miller written — I should (stamps 
the ground) — oh dear, the rascally doctors are to blame for 
it all ! If that humbug comes to my farm I'll — I'll break his 
legs for him. 

Scene 2. 

Johnson. Louisa. Questrup. 

QuESTRUP. (Comes in through gate from tvoods in the 
hackgrouncL) Good-morning I Good-morning! he ! he ! he I 

Johnson. Hallo ! Is that you, Questrup? Welcome, old 
fellow ! (Shake hands.) ^ 

Questrup (to Louisa). Your humble servant. Miss Ol- 
son ! Well, he ! he ! always beautiful like a blooming rose ! 
he ! he ! he ! 

Louisa. The 'Squire is very liberal with his compliments 
to-day. 

Questrup. The truth must out. Miss Olson ! It must 
out ! he ! he ! I must 

Johnson. AYell, well, Questrup, you can later be as gal- 
ant to the lady as you please, but now tliat I have you here 
I Avill no more release you than you would let a new lawsuit 
slip through your fingers. You see, my friend, I have 

Questrup. You observe, Miss Olson, that cruel fate re- 
moves me from a most pleasing situation ! he I he ! (Bows 
to Louisa and turns to Johnson). Go on, old fellow I You 



DISTURBANCE ON THE FAK31. 9 

see I have formed my face into the requisite business expres- 
sion. Accordingly, you have? 

Johnson. I have had annoyances since early morning — 

QuESTRUP (rubbing his hands), A little lawsuit? he I he I 

Johnson. No, it is something entirely different. We 
have a few blockheads here Avho have put a long nonsensical 
piece in the Chicago ''Times," about getting a humbug of a 
doctor to locate here ! If they had respected me sufficiently 
to ask my advice in the matter, you may believe I Avould 
have read the text to them ! It is enough to drive one mad I 

QuESTRUP. Well, that is a fine mess ! (aside) . He is 
still courting his old antipathy. 

Johnson. Yes, but we have no more time to talk about 
it ; Louisa can tell you later how exquisite lovely it will be 
when we get the humbug established among us, for of course 
she belongs to the opposition ! 

QuESTRUP. That's woman's nature, my friend I Suffrage 
will show itself, and (turns to Louisa) it is chiefly this that 
render women so (bowing) very irresistable ! he I he ! he ! 

Johnson. Oh, no more of your nonsense ! The little 
lady 

Louisa. Yes, the little lady supposed that the gentlemen 
had more important matters to discuss than the reason of 
woman's irresistableness. 

Johnson. Upon my honor, you are righf, and we will 
desist. (Tarns to Questrup) , The case stands like this, 
you see, I am very busy with the men in the field to-day. 
and this nonsense about doctors has put me out of sorts and 
made me morose, and I have not written the contract with 
the miller you're acquainted with the terms of it, I be- 
lieve ? 

Questrup. Yes. 

Johnson. It must go in the 2 o'clock mail in order to 
reach Milwaukee to-night. Can you oblige me by putting 
it in shape, that I may go out and see to the men? 

Questrup. With pleasure, Johnson ! By all means at- 
tend your men, I'll take care of the contract ! 

Johnson (slaps him on tlie shoulder). You're an uncom- 
monly fine fellow, Questrup ! 

(Imy.^T'RVI^ (flattered). Oil — he I he! lie I — don't men- 
tion it ! 



10 DISTURBANCE ON THE FAR3I. 

Johnson. The papers lie on my desk ; Louisa can pro- 
cure everything for you. But I must be off. So long I 
(^Ex'it through gate in background) . 

QcESTRLP. JGood-bve! 

Louisa. j 

Scene 3. 
Louisa. Questkup. 

QuESTKUP. Now I must beg you to get me those papers, 
so as to get this matter straightened out as soon as possible. 
Later we will go out and see the harvesting, for I have not 
come into the country to-day to sit buried in papers and doc- 
uments, he ! he ! he ! 

Louisa. Mr. Questrup, I have an idea ! 

QuESTRUP. No! — Lideed? he! he! 

Louisa. It is very interesting ! 

Questrup. Then I'll do anything to realize it ! 

Louisa (hozuing), Hoav gallant ! You see the sun is very 
warm in imcle's room ; so suppose we move the table out 
here, and you can sit in the shade under the walnut-tree and 
write, while you tell me something of Chicago. 

Questrup. The idea is charming ! 

Louisa. Then I'll go after the papers and table. {Goes 
toward Johnson'^f^ room), 

Questrup. You'll allow me to assist you? {FoUowh her. 
Both go into Johnson^s room and come oid immed'icdehj car- 
rying a tahle^ on which are writing materials) , This way, 
Miss Olson ! There ! Let us place it here. Many thanks. 

Louisa {taking hold of rocker). You prefer the rocker? 

Questrup {takes the rocker), 1 prefer you to let me carry 
the chair myself! {Sits doicn and commences to examinr- 
papers) . 

Lovisx { f/ouring oat coffee) . You'll permit me to offer 
you a cup of coffee ? 

Questrup. Nectar, you mean, he ! he ! Nectar, when 
you have made it, he ! he ! 

Louisa {laughing). I fear you praise it too highly. Per- 
haps it is not strong enough for you? 

Questrup (/a.s^///7 it). Um ! Delicious! Real nectar. 
he ! he ! 1 knew it would be ! 

Louisa. It is quite alarming how you have come to 
practice flattery ! Is that the fashion now in Chicago? 



DISTURBANCE ON THE FARM. 11 

QuESTRUP. But I am not flattering ! It is the plain, un- 
varnished truth, he ! he ! he ! 

Louisa. No, no ! Don't think you can make the country 
people believe everything ! ( Takes her seiuing and sits 
doiun) . But tell me something about Chicago. We only 
get one mail a week, and I have great curiosity to know 
what's going on. I know you have a great quantity of news. 

QuESTRUP. 1? — No, dear Miss Olson, I have, — if I may 
be pardoned the expression, — only J:hat of which the world 
was made. 

Louisa. What do you mean ? 

QuESTRUP. I mean ''Nothing." You know that's what 
the Avorld was made of. 

Louisa. Yes, thanks for the witticism, but I'll not let 
you off so easy. Come, be entertaining, and tell me of 
Chicago. I've never been there ! How do things look down 
there ? 

QuESTRUP. I can assure you. Miss Olson, that every- 
thing in Chicago is progressing in the same old-fashioned 
way ; but — you command, and I obey ! Supposing I relate 
you the charms and peculiarities of Chicago in a song ? 

Louisa. That would be delightful ! 

QuESTRUP. I am flattered. Miss Olson ! But it is the 
easiest way in which I can acquaint you with Chicago, so I 
will do it. {He sings) : 

"You are rich, you are beautiful, South?" 
But at the west a star brightly glimmers, 
It's Chicago that sparkles and shimmers. 

And where beauty invites you : Come out ! 

The Emigrant knows so perfect 

Where Aladdin's lamp is in waiting, 

II : He will find while investigating — 

That the lamp it has — a defect ! : || 

From the lake, whose mirror of blue 

Enhances the charms of all beauty, 
* See Chicago smoking and sooty — 

So black you will find but a few. 
'Tis grand, very grand, this prospect 

With steam, and steeples, and rumble ! 
II : Pray enter — take care you don't stumble, 
For our sidewalks have — a defect ! : || 

See the sparkling river and lake, 

Hear the steamer's whistling and ringing. 



12 DISTURBANCE OX THE FARM. 

And drawbridges constantly swinging — 
A picture of confusion make ! 
One must wait by the sun hotly decked 

An hour if commerce disposes, 
II : But forget not to cover your noses, — 
As the odor there has — a defect ! : || 

All corners policemen "emboss" 

— That is, where there's fine promenading, 
And where elegant ladies are waiting 

For a guide to conduct them across. 

About this we are very exact. 

But murder and loafer's vocation 

II: We cannot subject to invasion — 

As our habits here have — a defect ! :|| 

We're highly gallant all way 

Towards those who Chicago will visit, 
You will meet the Gent whose "biz" it 

Is that you must not go astray ! 

Everything he will show you correct! 
He will urge it with greatest persuasion ! 

II : And a later investigation 

Shows your portmanteau with — a defect ! : || 

There you liberty will comprehend ! 

With her golden fruits we ai e lavish ! 

Even revolvers the children carries 
Under pretence themselves to defend I 
The law has but slightest effect. 

Such trifles must ne one astonish ! 
II : Only greenhorns will try to admonish 
'rhat our laws have at all — a defect ! :|| 

Every street to its fullest extent 

With locomotives is crowded, 

And trackmen are lustily shouting. 
In order to prevent accident ! 
Here the coming generation inspect — 

Make a note of humanitie's phases ! 
II : We get thousands of lawsuits and cases (Rubs his hands) 
About this there is ne'er — a defect ! :|| 

Louisa. I thank yon, temporarily ! 1 must not oecAipy 
your time any longer at present, as the contract must be 
finished when uncle returns. I must also attend to the 
kitchen. But write diligently, so tliat we can liave a chat 
again. 

QuESTRur. Yes, if you wish it. Til work like a horse, 
he! he I 



DISTURBANCE OX THE FARM. 13 

Louisa. That's right ! ( Takes coffee-service off the table) . 
If yon are real diligent Ave shall have an opportunity to go 
out in the fields this afternoon and see the harvesting. (Exit 
through glass door) . 

(The white spread must remain on the table, also the photograph- 
album, Louisa's sewing, and dish of cookies). 

Scene 4. 

QuESTRUP. Later Louisa. 

QuESTRUP (rises to gaze through glass door after Louisa and 
soliloquizes). She is lovely ! I'm completely bewitched by 
that girl, he ! he ! he ! (Rubs his hands) . Johnson appears to 
me to be desirous of the match. Didn't he say that 1 could be 
as galant as I chose ? he ! he ! he ! It actually amounts to a 
request ! Courage, Questrup ! Boldly ventured is half won. 
She is worth a cool $40,000, he ! he ! She inherits all John- 
son's property. I drafted the will myself. Had no idea at 
that time that the chicken was being prepared for me ! he ! 
he ! (Pause) . It's an awkward position when one is about 
to ''pop" the question. My heart is coming out of my 
mouth ! If Johnson hadn't in every respect completely eman- 
cipated her, I could have arranged the business with him ; 
as it is, I must negotiate with herself. If I only knew how 
to commence the nonsense ! (Picks the white rose off in dis- 
traction) . But — sh ! Yes, sure enough, there she comes 
again !— hm ! (Goes to and fro humming) . 

Louisa (standing in glass door). But what do I see? I 
thought you was diligently writing so as to accompany me to 
the fields this afternoon ? Didn't you say that you would work 
like a horse ? 

Questrup. I — I — 

Louisa. Yes, you — you ! 

Questrup. It was so warm there — the sun fairly baked 
me! (Fans himself luith the rose) . 

Louisa (laughing) . Pshaw ! You was sitting in the 
shade. But what's this I see? Do you know what you 
ought to have ? 

Questrup. N — no ! 

Louisa. You ought to have your fingers whipped I You 
have plucked my beautiful white rose ! 

Questrup. (Gazing confusedly cd rose) . Oh! 

Louisa. Yes, "oh !" But that does not replace the rose. 



14 DISTURBANCE OX THE FARM. 

But just wait ! I'm already so far Americanized that I know 
I'm entitled to damages. What do you offer? 

QuESTRUP. (Aside). Now or never! Here is the op- 
portunity ! 

Louisa. Well, what do you offer? 
QuESTRUP. (Kneels) . Myself ! 

Louisa. (Laughs) . Yes, thank you I But that will not 
replace my rose. 

QuESTRUP. (RisiiKj), Miss Olson — dear Louisa — bear 
with me a moment — I will — I will surround you with roses 
— with the most beautiful — I — this rose — this beautiful little 
rose — he ! he ! — it was so like you. Louisa, that I loved it ! 
And I was obliged to possess it ! (Tcihes her hand). Oh. 
Louisa, my beloved — 

Louisa. Detach me, Questrup, I may 

QuESTRUP. Only hear how I thee covet, 

Do not try to run away ! 
Lonely I about am plodding, 
While for thee my heart is throbbing, 
Oh, Louisa — 

Louisa. nay, oh, nay! (Makes effort to go), 

QuESTRi'P. Please, oh, please don't run away ! 
— Here within a heart is beating 
Very warm for thee, my dear ! 
15,000, without fibbing, 
I can offer, free and clear ; 
And a home quite nicely furnished — 
Louisa. (Aside,) Oh, but I am so astonished! 
Questrup. — Oh, Louisa — 

Louisa. nay! oh, nay! (Finns into house through 

glass door) , 

Questrup. There ! But nov/ she ran away. 

Scene 5. 
Questrup. Lind. 

Questrup. (Brushing his loiees), Ilm ! My pretty 
miss is rather haughty ! (Throws the rose au-ajj). But tliis 
does not end the play. Miss Proudlook, you may depend. 
When Johnson returns, Questrup and I will ha\'e a few 
serious words with him, and — then — 



DISTURBANCE ON THE FARM. 15 

LiND. (^Coming through gate in background ; lie is dad hi 
a light summer suit). Good-morning, sir! 

QuESTRUP. {Turns surjjvised) , Good-morning! 

LiND. Mr. Johnson, I presume? 

QuESTRUP. No ! my name is Questrup. Lawyer Qiiest- 
rup of Chicago ! {Producing card) . Here's my card ! 

LiND. {Looking hard at him) , Questrup! Why, really ! 
I know you very well ! 

Questrup. Indeed ! There are a great many people 
who know me. I have a very extensive practice. 

LiND. I'm glad to hear you say so ! But it is not through 
your extensive practice that I know you. Look at me ! 
Don't you recollect me ? 

Questrup. {Gazing at him) , Let me see — no — no, I 
give it up ! I can't recollect having formerly — 

LiND. My name is Lind. Henry Lind from Elsinore ! 

Questrup. Dear me, from Elsinore ! — but — I — never- 
theless, I can't — 

Lind. Well, I was but a little rat when I went to school 
to you, but 

Questrup. Hold on I I have it ! It was you I called the 
mischiefmaker ! Henry Mischief! ha! ha! ha! Oh, yes, I 
remember you very well ! 

Lind. {Laughing), And we used to call you ''old fel- 
low," ha ! ha ! ha ! It was not at that time because of your 
age, but you had such old-fashioned manners. I hope you 
don't take oifense at my talking so freely, old fellow ? 

Questrup. {Somewhat provoked) . Of course not. 

Lind. Do you live here? 

Questrup. No ! Didn't I just tell you I live in Chicago? 

Lind. Right ! I forgot. Then you are up here on busi- 
ness ? Fleecing the farmers in some little law suit ? 

Questrup. {Angry) . Not at all I I am visiting John- 
son, an old friend of mine. 

Lind. I have found the place then. Johnson lives here? 

Questrup. He does. 

Lind. {Takes Louisa's sewing), 1 see there are ladies 
on the farm ! As I intend locating hereabouts, it can't be 
detrimental to my interest to make a few lady acquaintances. 
You must help me do that ! In lady acquaintances one com- 
bines profit with pleasure, — especially is this the case in 



16 DISTURBANCE ON THE FARM. 

America. I tell you, our pretty belles will soon be the 
stronger sex in this Republic ; they're very near acquiring 
the right to vote, and then 

QcESTRUP. Pardon me ! But what are you, and when 
did you come to America ? 

LiND. That's two questions at a time ! In answer to the 
first, I'm a physician ; to the second, I arrived in New York 
about two months since, so that I am little more than a 
greenhorn . 

QuESTRUP. You're a physician? 

LiND. That's about it, old fellow ! 

QuESTRUP. (Aside), That being the case, this dudish 
chap will not be a very dangerous rival ! 

LiND. What's that you are muttering? 

QuESTRUP. I was saying, that you would evidently seek 
practice in this vicinity ? 

LiND. That is just my idea. You see, I noticed in 
(takes a cooky^ eats and talks simultaneously) a Chicago pa- 
per a call for a young Scandinavian physician to locate here, 
and a good friend of mine, who knows Mr. Johnson, advised 
me to see him, he being one of the most influential men in 
the neighborhood. And thus our meeting, quod erat demon- 
strandum ! 

QuESTRUP. That Avas very good advice, your friend gave 
you, and you must not neglect using it. You will find Mr. 
Johnson out in the wheat field in (pointing out through hack- 
ground) — that direction. (Aside) . Now you will be paid 
for your ''old fellow," you scoundrel ! 

LiND. Then I'll go out and see him at once. But how 
strange that we should meet thus ! Eh ? Now you can speak 
a kind w^ord for me to the ladies here, while I go and see 
Mr. Johnson. 

QuESTRUP. Of course, my friend I 

LiND. I suppose you're married and have a large family? 

QuESTRUP. No, I am not ! 

LiND. Well, then, it's high time that you were. I say, 
do you remember the pretty little Amelia in Elsinore ? How 
you used to shadow her around ! She gave you a good sized 
winter mitten along to America, I'll bet ! Slie is married 
to 



DISTURBANCE OX THE FAK3I. 17 

QuESTRCP. (Angry), Oh, may I once for all time beg 
you to be silent about these childish stories ! 

LiND. Childish stories ! Both you and she had arrived 
at full age, 111 be bound ! 

QuESTRUP. AVell, all the same, I'm not fond of having 
the old nonsense rehearsed. 

LiND. I beg pardon ! I thought it would interest you to 
hear something of your old inclination. (Eats cooky and 
examines photograj)h album) . 

QuESTRUP. (^Aside). I believe it is best at once to pre- 
vent his opportunity to pay attention to Louisa, as it appears 
that rascal would be hard to get rid of if he once sees her. 
And then, too, he possesses these Freshmen airs which our 
emancipated misses think so very charming, and one never 
knows what may happen. Only see how he is cramming 
the cookies down ! My God, as though he had had nothing 
to eat for two weeks ! (Aloud) . I say, my friend, you're an 
old pupil of mine, and I know it would please you to hear 
of anything of a happy character liaving happened me, so I 
will — (looks around) — I will tell you a secret — (lohispers) 
— but you must promise me to observe the strictest con- 
fidence ! 

Ijnd. ( With mouth full of cooky). Gracious, yes. 

QuESTRUP. You can keep a secret? 

LiND. (Eating), Two, if you wish ! 

QuESTRUP. (Whispering). I'm secretly engaged. 

LiND. (Constantly eating) . Congratulate, old fellow I 
(Pressing his hand). Who is the fortunate 

QuESTRUP. Auw, Auw ! is that a way to — to congratulate ? 
and then you shout as though you w^ere born in the Avoods ! 

LiND. Beg pardon ! It was the surprise ! Who is it, 
then? 

QuESTRUP. I told you it was a secret I 

LiND. Well, I understood you as though you wished to 
confide it me? 

QuESTRUP. Yes, later ! Wait a few days ! I'm waiting 
for Johnson's consent to-night. But ''mum" is the word. 

LiND. Gracious, yes I \^Aside~\. Miss Johnson. \o 
doubt. \_Aloud'\. There's money of course, old fellow? 
She is not \qyj handsome, but $20,000 makes love easier, 



18 DISTL'HBANCE ON THE FAK31. 

analogous with ''when the manger is empty the horses 
bite I" Eh? 

QcESTRUP. How often must I remind you to speak low? 
But I must leave you now, as I promised Johnson to finish 
a writing for him, and \^g cithers papers itp'], 

LiND. Don't neglect it for tlie sake of Ins anticipated 
consent I 

QuESTRi'P. Certainly not I But you had better go and 
see him at once, as he may go to Mihvaukee this afternoon. 
Until then, good bye I \_Exits into house through glass doorli. 

Scene G. 
LiNi). Later Louisa. 

LiND. \_Seats himself beside the tcd>le~\. I am really 
tired as a dog, and have not the slightest desire to tramp out 
iu the fields in this heat. Johnson will undoiibtedly beat 
home before he goes to Milwaukee, and — the whole matter 
could Avait until to-morrow. I suppose I at least can have 
lodgings here for the night. \_Turns leaves of photograph al- 
hum~\. What's this? \^Juinps up suddeidij : holds a loose 
pjhoto in his hand~\. My photograph! But — impossible I 
And yet it is me I 

Louisa. — 
{She has come through glass door unnoticed by him, icalks up 
behind and takes the picture oitt of his hand and puts in her pocket) 
— Sir, you take liberties ! 

LiND. \_T'arns surprised~\. Miss — I beg par — but — 
really — can it be ? Louisa I 

Louisa. Lind I 

LiND. l^Grasps both her hands']. Yes, it is really you I 
\_Lets go her hands]. Oh, excuse my boldness ! Am I not 
excusable when after a lapse of so maiiy years I find you? 
How pretty you have grown I Yes, it must out ! out, that I 
am so pleased, so happy to find you once more I And you, 
Louisa, you had not entirely forgotten me I 

Louisa. Oh, how can you ask such a question? Do you 
believe I coidd so easily forget him who once so kindly aided 
me ? Do you think I could ever forget how kindly you 
cheered my sick mother in Bergen ? How you during the 
lon<i: sick ni":hts sat beside her bed and read to her out of 
the Bible and comforted her with God's word I If so, you 
did not know me ! But vou did not think so. did vou? 



DISTURBANCE ON THE FARM. 19 

LiND. No, in truth, Louisa, I allowed myself to hope 
that you had not forgotten me. 

Louisa. But why did we never hear from you ? 

LiND. After finishing my two years' trip with the Cor- 
vette I returned to Denmark, and first then I discovered 
that your dear mother was dead. To my letter sent you 
from Madeira I received no reply. 

Louisa . You wrote to me ? 

LiND. You didn't know it? 

Louisa. We never received any letter from you. But 
how it pleases me to know you did write ! 

LiND. I am so grateful to you for these words, Louisa ! 
All I learned of you was, that you had gone to Christiania, 
and from there to America. That was all the information 
there remained for the friend who sought and sought and so 
prayed to find ! I wrote your Aunt Caroline in Bergen, but 
the letter was returned to me unopened, as she, too, had 
passed away. In short — I renewed my search and came to 
America. \_A hrief paitse^. But now, Louisa, you must 
tell me how it is I find you here ? 

Louisa. After my mother died I went to Christiania. 
While there I received a letter Avhich was written to my 
mother from her half brother who, while quite young went 
to Sweden, and having been defrauded out of a considerable 
sum there, emigrated to America. He had informed my 
mother at his departure that she would not hear from him 
until he had become a rich man. So many years passed by 
that we finally became familiar with the thought that he 
must be dead. Now the letter came, but too late for my 
poor, dear mother to derive any happiness from it ! Uncle 
wrote how he had suffered many hardships in America. He 
had served as a soldier in the civil war and been wounded. 
After the close of the war he obtained some land and became 
quite prosperous. He is now a rich man. He sent money 
sufficient to defray traveling expenses, and begged us to 
come and live with him. I came, and God bless uncle ! 
He is as a loving, kind father to me ! — But now you must 
inform me how it happens that I see you here ? 

LiND. Yes, it is iso very wonderful how fate sometimes 
plays with '•'parting" and ''meeting!" I Avas in New York 



20 DISTLKBANCE ON THE FAKM. 

and saw from an advertisement in a Chicago paper that a 
doctor is desired here, and 

Louisa. Oh, dear I I quite forgot you are a physician ! 
Don't breathe it to a living soul I 

LiND. \_Gi'eatlij surprised^. But — I do not understand 
you? Besides, Questrup knoAvs it, I was just talking with 
him, and 

Louisa. Questrup ! Then all is lost I He will certainly 
tell! Oh, what shall I do I 

LiND. I really am unable to comprehend 

Louisa. No, yon can't understand, but — wait — I have an 
idea! (Puts hand in pocket) . Take this key! (Points out 
left). You see the little pavilion out yonder? It is mine ; 
uncle built it for me ; go in there and lock the door after 
you. Don't show yourself at the window, I will come and 
explain everything presently ! But do take the key ! 

LiXD. (Takes the key). But — I — dear Louisa, I don't 
see that 

Louisa. (Almost crying). For my sake ! Lind, hurry ! 

LiXD. I will hasten ! (Exit hurriedly left) . 

Scene 7. 

Louisa. Later Johnson. 

Louisa. (Gazing a minute after Lind as he disappears) . 
I am entirely confused ! At once so happy and so frightened ! 
How shall I — (listens) — Dear me, it is uncle ! 

Johnson. (Coining through gate in background). Pooh ! 
pah ! pooh ! This is what I call a genuine cannibal heat ! 
(Drops into rocker). You may believe, Louisa, it's scorch- 
ing in the field to-day ! Oh, fetch me a glass of milk, child ! 

Louisa. (Confused). Milk? 

Johnson. . Yes, my girl ! 

Louisa. (Aside). If I only dared to tell him ! 

Johnson. It was the milk, my dear, I must go at once 
again . 

Louisa. Instantly, uncle! (Bashful). You see, dear 
uncle — you can't think — if I only knew — if — I will get the 
milk right away ! (Stands picking her apron) . 

Johnson (rises). See here, Louisa, are you in your right 
senses, child? — You stand here as though you had lost both 
nose and mouth ! What has happened? \yiiere is Questrup ? 



1 



DISTURBANCE ON THE EARM. 21 

Louisa. Questrup ! Yes, I mean no ! I will fetch the 
milk ! (^Hurries into house) . 

Johnson. (Whistles). Questrup yes ! Questrup no, I 
mean ! H'm ! — The girl is completely upset ! What in the 
world has happened? (Hasty). I'm going to know at once ! 

Louisa (ivith a glass of milk). Here, if you please uncle ! 

Johnson. Thank you, child ! (Puts glass on table with- 
out drinking). Now tell me, what is the matter, Louisa? 
Tell me candidly, I wdsh to know ! 

Louisa. Matter? Nothing! 

Johnson. Goodness-gracious ! Of course there is some- 
thing the matter ! And, understand me, I'm going to know ! 

Louisa. (Aside.) There, now uncle is excited, and then 
I daren't say a word 1 

Johnson. (Places himself squarely in front of her) . 
Louisa, if you w^ill not speak, I — where is Questrup? Has 
he 

Louisa. (Quickly). Yes, he has ! 

Johnson. AYhat? 

Louisa. Proposed to me ! 

Johnson. Ques — what, if you please ? What is it you 
say ? Has he proposed to you ? What did you answer ? 

Louisa. I? 

Johnson. Yes, the Dickens, who else? 

Louisa. I didn't answer anything, I ran away ! 

Johnson. (Drinks the milk) . My little Louisa, (strokes 
her cheek) can you make me a cup of coffee, quick ? I must 
out in the field again at once ; can you have it ready 
directly ? 

Louisa. Yes, uncle ! (Hurries into house) . 

Scene 8. 

Johnson. Soon Questrup. Later Louisa. 

Johnson. ( Walks to and fro). So the old dog w^ants to 
lick milk, too ! Well, one must not consider anything impos- 
sible in this enlightened age ! (Drops into rocker and rocks 
violently) . I can't keep from laughing when I think — ha ! 
ha ! ha ! Such an old scarecrow ! ha ! ha ! ha ! 

Questrup. (Appears in door leading to Johnson^s room. 
Holds contract in his hand. Hesitates a moment in doorway 
when he hears Johnson laugh). (Aside). He laughs ! I'll 



22 DISTURBANCE ON THE FARM. 

bet a $100 that the doctor has received his traveling-pass ! 
(Aloud), Yes, in truth, Johnson, it was a very laughable 
affair ? ha ! ha ! ha ! 

Johnson. (Looking seriouslij) . Yes, it was very com- 
ical ! Did the heat derange your mental faculty ? 

QuESTRUP. Deranged ? What do you mean ? How can I 
help it? I am as innocent as the babe imborn ! 

Johnson. (Hasty), You don't mean to say it was 
Louisa that 

QuESTRUP. Louisa ! Not at all ! She knows nothing at 
all about it ! 

Johnson. Are you stark, raving mad? Does Louisa 
know nothing at all about it? 

QuESTRUP. He came alone I She has not exchanged a 
single word with him ! 

Johnson. He came alone! Which ''he?" 

QuESTRUP. Which ''he?" The doctor, most certainly ! 

Johnson. The doctor I See here, are you quite level mi- 
der the wig ? 

QuESTRUP. Dear me, Johnson, he stood here talking his 
nonsense a half hour, and then he went out to see you in the 
field. He wished to get a recommend from vou, and — oh — 
ha ! ha ! ha ! it's so profoundly comical, ha ! ha ! ha ! 

Johnson, (Angry), So there has been a doctor here ! 
h'm ! I might have guessed as much ! ( Whistles) . It is no 
wonder you both are deranged ! So the doctor has been here ! 

Louisa. (Appears in door with a cup of coffee on a tray; 
she hears Jolinson^s last vjords^ drops the tray and excJaims:) 
He knows all ! 

Johnson. Hallo ! There goes the coffee ! 

Louisa. I will immediately fetch another cup I 

Johnson. I don't wish for any ! 

Louisa. Don't be angry, uncle, I 

Johnson. Angry? I am not angry in the least ! I hear 
that you have been under treatment ! It's all so perfectly 
natural ! Only let me catch the plaster-maker, I will — li'm ! 
h'm ! ( Whistles) , Where did lie go ? 

QuESTRUP. Perhaps he's wandering about the field seek- 
ing you. I thought you had talked with him and shipped 
him farther west ! 

Louisa. (Aside), I fear the worst now I 



DISTURBANCE OX THE FARM. 23 

QuESTRUP. Here's the contract ; it is finished and only 
needs your signature. 

Johnson. Good. I'll go in and affix my name. (Exits 
into house) . 

QuESTRUP. (Dntniming with fingers on the table. Brief 
pause). You are not provoked with me, dear Miss Olson? 
I assure you that — 

Louisa {quicldy), Mr. Questrup, let us not mention it 
again, let the past be forgotten ! At present the question is 
how to prevent uncle in his excitement from doing the doctor 
a violence. Try and soften him a little and oppose his an- 
tipathy. 

Questrup. Plague take the doctor I If he gets an over- 
hauling it will be well deserved ; I don't care to oppose your 
uncle in that respect, and I am man enough to defend the 
case if that tramp should bring one against him. No, be 
quite at ease and depend upon me in that direction ! he ! 
he! he! 

Johnson. (Comes out of his room luith the contract in his 
hand). Here is the contract, Louisa, if you will give it to 
Martin when he comes. I will send him to the house di- 
rectly. Now, Questrup, come with me, I wish a few words 
with you. 

Questrup. (Consults ]iis luatch) , Yes, but you must 
wait an hour or so, my friend, as I must see Peter Ander- 
son ; I have a case of his to manage, and am to see him at 
12 o'clock. 

Johnson. (While passing through gate in hachgrouncl) , 
Then come out in the field as soon as possible, as that I wish 
of you is also of importance. ( Goes, hut returns immediately) 
I say, Louisa, dear, if that humbug comes here again you 
will favor me by telling him to go to Jericho ! (Exit) . 

Questrup. (Goes out of gate near house). So long! 

Scene 9. 

-Louisa. Laying cojitr act on the table). There! Now it 
is as bad as it well can be ! What shall I, poor unfortunate 
girl, do? I must talk with Lind at once — but — oh ! if only 
Questrup was not here, I could probably reason with uncle, 
and perhaps he would relinquish his antipathy at least as re- 
gards Lind, but now I Oh, 



24 DISTURBANCE ON THE FARM. 

Dear mother, how I miss you now ! 
You would advise and guide me ! 

{Exits slowly hft). 
Scene 10. 
John Erichson. Brorson. 

{Both from gate in background). 
Erichson. I fear Ave will not find Johnson at the house 
to-day, he will undoubtedly be in the held. Wait here a 
moment, and I will go inside and inquire after him. {Goes 
into house through glass door), 

Brorson. Here is Avhere the battle is to be fought, as I 
understand Erichson. He says that Johnson is the most in- 
fluential man hereabouts, but that he has so often been de- 
ceived by humbug doctors that he feels a decided antipathy 
toward every physician, Avhich is the reason why he did not 
wish to speak to him on the subject until the doctor had ar- 
rived. It's far from pleasant to come up here from Chicago 
in the belief that one will be received with open arms, and 
then to run foul of such cliifs I My good John Erichson 
should have removed such obstructions before inserting his 
notice in the paper. 

Erichson. ( Comes out again) . It was as I supposed. 
There is no one at home but the servant girl. Johnson has 
gone out in the field with a lawyer from Chicago. 
Brorson. Who is it? 

Erichson. Oh, I suppose it is Questrup ; he comes here 
every few days. 

Brorson. Questrup? Then I shall meet an acquaintance 
at least. Let us go and see them. 

{Exit through gate in background). 

Scene 11. 
Louisa. Lind. 

{Enters from the left). 
Lind. I fully realize, dear Louisa, that my position as 
a physician seeking a location will not be tenable here under 
the circumstances, and I will, however indisposed, renounce 
it ; but, after all I have heard of your uncle, he must be a 
kind and sensible man, and I can't see why he should not 
receive me kindly when I present myself as an old acquaint- 
ance of his deceased' sister and you. 



DISTURBANCE ON THE FARM. 25 

Louisa. Oh, you may be assured he will ! He is very 
kind and good, but is of a hasty temper, and it is this I fear 
if he should be taken by surprise. His antipathy toward 
the medical profession has been kept alive to a great degree 
because of the humbug a number of quacks practice in this 
country, but I am confident, that when I find the right op- 
portunity to talk sensibly with him he will desist in his an- 
tipathy, at least as far as you are concerned. As long as 
Questrup stays here, however, it will be impossible to have 
a quiet talk with him. 

LiND. How long will Questrup remain? 

Louisa. I couldn't say. At times he remains here sev- 
eral days. 

LiND. But would it not be possible to get him on our 
side ? With Miss Johnson's aid, for instance ? 

Louisa. What Miss Johnson? Whom do you mean? 

LiND. I mean Questrup's — (aside). Stop, I came near 
disclosing the secret ! 

Scene 12. 

The Former. Martin. 

Martin. (Comes througJi yate in hackg round ) . Hoav 
do you do ! ( Offers Lind his hand) . 

Louisa. Our hired man, Martin W^olflf — Mr. Lind ! 

Lind. How are you ! 

Martin. Have you come to us in the harvest? 

Lind, Yes, I thought I would take a trip into the coun- 
try to-day. 

Martin. Do you want to get work here ? We need a 
couple of hands for a few days. 

Lind. Not a bad idea, that ! But I'm not much accus- 
tomed to that sort of Avork. 

Martin. Oh, that's all right, and the wages are quite 
good noAv. Talk with Johnson. You'll get a job. What 
sort of fellow are you, anyway? (Eyes him), 

Lind. I am 

Louisa. \^Quickhj^. He is a student. 

Martin. Oh, indeed, is that all? I thought you was a 
dry-goods clerk. Where do you come from? 

Lind. From Ncav York. But I was there only two 
months ; I come from Christiania. 



26 DISTURBANCE ON THE FARM. 

Martin. Then you know Peter S wen son, my brother- 
in-law ? 

LiND. No, I was in Christiania but three clays ; I'm a 
Dane. 

Martin. Oh, you are ! But I have little time now ; this 
evening I woukl like to chat with you, and I will play for 
you on my fiddle. 

LiND. Thank you I You're a fine fellow I 

Martin. [2o Louisa']. I was to take a letter? 

Louisa. \^Gives it him]. Here it is. 

Martin. Any other errand? 

Louisa. No, you can go when you please. 

Martin. All riglit ! [Exit] . 

Scene 13. 

LiND. Louisa. 

Louisa. And now Avhen uncle comes 1 shall present you 
as Student Lind, an old acquaintance 

LiND. May I suggest, Candidaf us lu'iud? and we shall 
confine ourselves to fact. 

Louisa. \^S7niling]. Very well, as youAvish, Mr. Ccui- 
didatus^ and finally, not a word about your being a physician. 

Lind. Certainly ! And if Questrup throws out insinua- 
tions, I shall laugh in his face and say that I told him the 
fib about my being a doctor in order to cure his inquisitive- 
ness. However, I don't fear him, as I can tell that which 
he would not much like. 

Louisa. How so? 

Lind. That must remain my secret. But now. dear 
Louisa, despite all our calculations, something may happen 
to upset it all. Therefore, pardon me for employing the op- 
portunity. If everything fails me here, is there still a hope 
I may take away with me? A hope I have fostered since I 
first saw you ; a hope, Louisa, which, whatever may betide 
me, always will sustain my courage and dream of a bright 
future. I have been bold enough to continue to hope from 
the day when I left the cliffs at Bergen, until I found you 
here in this Wisconsin forest. [^He sings]. 

While in the silent night the Corvette grandly 
Pursued her course across the mighty sea, 

The moon's rays aslant each billow blandly 
Reflected your sweet picture back to me. 



DISTURBANCE ON THE FARM. 27 

From Heaven's arch the stars brightly beaming 

Lit our pathway to the tropic land, 
I saw a shapely starry-image gleaming — 

It called me back to Bergen's pretty strand. 

Oh, dear Louisa, my beloved, answer ! 

If you did feel the same longing fear — 
That burned in my heart? — May I aver: 

Louisa in her heart held me most dear? 

Louisa. — 

Oh, let Wisconsin's stately forest tell thee 

Whereto my longing's dream and hope did go ! 

But now Atlantic's billows back has brought me 
From Bergen's shore my fondest hope I know ! 

{Gives Lind her hand.) 

QUESTRUP. 

{Appears in gate in background unnoticed. He remains stand- 
ing there ivithoiit being discovered by Lind and Louisa). 

Lind. Oh, Louisa, let come now what may ! I only 
pray for health and courage and I shall be the happiest of 
men ! {Emhraces her) . 

QuESTRUP. {Aside), O, oh, how emotional! — Only 
wait, and Questrup and I will soon extinguish that blissful 
flame! {^Exits hastily). 

Scene 14. 
Anna. Lind. Louisa. 

Anna. — 

{Comes running in through gate near house). 
— Oh, dear ! Oh, dear ! 

Louisa. K^j^^^.^.^, 

Lind. j 

Anna. Oh — it is — oh — help ! 

Lind. But, speak girl ! What has happened ? 

Anna. Oh — Martin — the black horse has killed him ! Oh ! 
Help ! ! 

Louisa. ) Martin ? 

Lind. j Where did the accident happen? Come and 
show me ! Show me to him ! 

Anna. He lies dead outside of the stable ; Oh, the blood 
is running down him ! Help ! 

Louisa. {Hurries out through gate near hoitf^e). Come 
Lind, this way ! (All exit). 



28 disturbaxce ox the faem. 

Scene 15. 

Johnson. Qlestrup. 

{Both from the left). 

Johnson. It is bosh and nonsense I I will not endure it ! 
Don't you try to tell me that Louisa would so far forget 
herself ! 

QuESTRUP. I assure you upon my honor- 



Johnson. Oh, your legal honor be hanged ! It is an in- 
fernal lie, every word of it ! — (Looks about) . There's no one 
here ! Where are they then ? 

QuESTRUP. How can I know? But here he stood, and 
there she stood, and then they kissed each oth 

Johnson. Shut up ! Not another word ! It is jealousy 
that has command of you, you old ape ! Yes, stare at me I 
I know all your pranks, you camel ! But you must face it ! 
(Seizes him hy the collar). Come in ! It is you who accuses 
and not me I Come ! (Drags him in throufjh glass door). 

Scene 16. 

Louisa. 
Louisa. (Enters through gate near house). Oh, how he 

bleeds ! It's a horrible sight ! Where is the door 1 

I was to get some linen — everything seems to spin around ! 
(Leans on rocker) I am ill — (Sinks into rocker and faints). 

Scene 17. ^ 

QuESTRUP. Louisa. Later Johnson. 

QuESTRUP. (Li doorway) , No, the lovers were not there ! 
(Sees Louisa) But — (approaches her) — the girl is actually — 
(takes herhand) yes, it is a fact, she has fainted ! — he ! he ! 
he ! It is wonderful what love will — oh, but she is lovely ! 
(Kisses her hand), 

Johnson. (Li the doorway of his room). See here! — 
(hurries up and pushes Questrup aside). This is almost too 
much, you scarecrow ! (Kicks after him. Looks at Louisa) 
Oh I — Oh ! She — she has — Questrup, fetch some restorative, 
some water I Don't stand there staring, you fool ! Make 
haste! (Makes kick at him). Water! water! 

Questrup. (Aside), That's a fine mess to make so much 
ado about ! Only a trifling — faintness of sheer love ! (aloud) 



DISTURBANCE ON THE FARM. 29 

Yes, I will fetch the water at once ! {Hurried exit through 
glass door) , 

Scene 18. 

Johnson. Erichson. Brorson. Louisa. 

(Erichson and Brorson from gate in background). 

Erichson. But what has happened, Johnson? 

Johnson. Oh, clear me ! Everything is in commotion ! 
1 believe Louisa is dead ! 

Brorson — 
{Hurries forward and takes Louisa's hand). 

Johnson. No, stop ! Don't touch her — I shall 

Erichson. Pshaw, Johnson ! Be sensible, and let the 
doctor help her ! 

Johnson. Doc — eh! What? 

Erichson. (^Pidling Johnson aside ivhile Brorson holds a 
small vial tender Louisa'' s nostril). Zounds, Johnson ! You 
must be sensible ! He can help her if help is possible ! 

Brorson. {Turning to Johnson). Beat ease, Mr. John- 
son, there is no danger ! The young lady suffers from an 
illness caused by the heat, or perhaps some sudden surprise. 
There is no danger whatever ! 

Louisa. {Opening eyes.) Oh, — what has happened? 
Where am I? 

Johnson. {Hastens to her side) . With me, my child! 
With me ! 

Louisa. I am so confused — I — what a horrible sight ! 
{Shudders). 

Johnson. Quiet, my child ! Quiet! {To Brorson) . M^y 
she talk yet? 

Brorson. {Smiling). As much as she please ! But you 
had better conduct her into the house. Let her recline a 
few minutes on a sofa, and give her a draught of cold water, 
and it will all be over. 

(Johnson and Erichson conduct Louisa into house through 
glass door) . 

Johnson. {Turning in doorivay) . Come along with us, 
please. 

Brorson. My presence is wholly superfluous, but if you 
desire it {Exits into house). 



30 disturbance on the farm. 

Scene 19. 
QuESTRLP. Shortly comes Brorson and Lind. 

QuESTRUP. (Comes running out of Jolinson^s room icith 
a pitcher in his hand). No trace of water to be found! 
Everything is dried up I Where shall I find water? That 
jade will not die anyway, but Johnson acts as though an evil 
spirit had taken possession of him, and one must exhibit 
himself in the pleasantest manner possible ! I must run down 
to the fountain ! (Exit hurriedly left), 

Lind. (^From gate near house) , AYhat in the world has 
detained Louisa so ? She promised to fetch me some linen I 

Brorson. (Comes out from house). What? Lind! I 
imagined you had remained in New York ? 

Lind. And you said you were going to Chicago? But 
here's no time for explanation ! — (Takes the white spread off 
the table). This must serve me for binding. Come with me ! 
I have a patient where it is a matter of life or death ! (Both 
hurriedly exit fhrofigh gate near house). 

Scene 20. 

Johnson. ' Presently Questrup. 

Johnson. (From the glass door). Hallo, doctor! (looks 
around), AVhere in all creation has he gone now? This is 
almost more than my strength will endure ! No sooner has 
Louisa recovered consciousness than she says Martin is 
killed, and lies almost dead outside the stable door ! Uh ! — 
that will be a dreadful sight, but I must out there ! (Goes 
toward gate near house), 

Questrup. (Comes rushing in with pitcher in his hand 
through gate near house ; collides with Johnson, Questrup 
drops the pitcher) , There ! There lies the water for Louisa ! 

Johnson. To Halifax with it ! There is nothing the 
matter with Louisa, but Martin is kiUed ! Haven't you seen 
the doctor? 

Questrup. The doctor? No, not since lie stood here 
kissing Louisa. 

Johnson. (Gives him a push). It was yourself, you 
fool ! (Hurries out through gate near house), 

Questrup. (Stands gaziiig after Johnson a moment). 
Formerly I was an ape ! Now I am a fool ! Oh, the blessed, 
by romance-scribblers so liighly praised, rural peace and 



DISTURBANCE ON THE FARM. 31 

quietude ! How many actions at law might I not bring 
ao:ainst these n^entlemen for falsehood and slander? AYhat an 
infatuating ideal have I not experienced on the beautiful 
prairies of Wisconsin in the course of an hour's time ! First 
that simple country coquette flirts with me, and gets me to 
propose to her, when she unhesitatingly gives me the rnitten ! 
Inside of five minutes she engages herself to a smooth face 
who first then enters the house ! I am favored with such 
epithets as liar, ape, beast, fool, and the Lord knows what 
else, because I informed Johnson ; then the madamoiselle 
faints from sheer admiration of her Doctor-Lout, and I am 
dispatched to deliver blood for the tragedy, or, as I would 
say, water for the faintness ! Then 1 fetch the water, and 
am told : To Halifax w^ith the water for Louisa, for now 
Martin is killed ! Then Johnson bellows for the doctor 
who previously was excommunicated, and— (kills a mosquito 
on his hand) then the accursed mosquitos bite — as — oh, you 
blessed Chicago! Thou ''Queen of the West" beside the 
rippling waters of lake Michigan I If I was only safely there 
again ! (lights a cigar). Yes, you have made a fine journey ! 
Peter Questrup ! Now we will go and lie down in the shade 
of the old oak so as to gather strength till a new hurricane 
blows up, for of course it will only be a short time. (Exit 
through gate near house). 

Scene 21. 
Johnson. 
Johnson. (From gate near house) . Well, well ! ( Wijjes 
perspiration from forehead) . That's what is called being 
lord in your own house I Hasn't the doctor locked the door 
and says that no one must be admitted ! I'll go in and see 
how Louisa is getting on. (Exit through, glass door). 
Scene 22. 
LiND. Louisa. Later Johnson. 

(Both from gate near hoi$se.) 
LiND. Yes, fortunately, dear Louisa, my method of 
treatment was sufficient, and Martin is saved. In a few 
weeks he will be convalescent. Y^our uncle was at this mo- 
ment at the door of Martin's room, but I had Brorson tell 
him that lie must wait, and that no one must be admitted, 
but that Martin's life is out of dan^rer. He left after this ex- 



32 DISTURBANCE ON THE FARM. 

planatioii. Brorson Avill stay temporarily with him, aud to- 
night we will spell each other in watching with him. But 
Brorson told me a lady had fainted — 

Louisa. {Laughing) , Yes, it was I, Lind I It was 
over in a minute ! 

Johnson. (^From door leading to his room). Oh, there 
you are, Louisa I 

Louisa. Dear uncle, here is an old acquaintance I must 
introduce to you ; it is Candidatus Lind from Denmark, who 
lived with us in Bergen. He has come to visit me. 

Johnson. Indeed ! That's finally something pleasant in 
all this commotion ! AVelcome, Mr. Lind ! Then you are 
the Mr. Lind Aunt Caroline wrote about? 

Louisa. {Quickly), Exactly so, uncle I 

Johnson. Then doubly welcome ! And thanks for all 
the kindness and self-denial you exhibited toward my de- 
ceased sister ; I shall not forget it, Mr. Lind I But now you 
must settle down with us here. The house is somewhat dis- 
turbed to-day, but with God's help everything will soon be 
righted again. You will remain with us? 

Lind. If I shall not abuse vour kindness, I should be 
de 

Johnson. Kindness I P'shaw I Louisa, dear, put a room 
in order for Mr. Lind, and — make yourself perfectly at home 
on the farm I — But are you quite recovered now, Louisa? 

Louisa. Entirely so, dear uncle I 

Johnson. Yes, you may believe, Mr. Lind, things wore 
a serious aspect recently here. Louisa was nearly dead, 
but just then a doctor came, and I must confess he is a nice 
man. He saved Louisa, and I shall never forget it I {Pats 
Louisa's cheek), 

Lind. {Someiohai provoked). Oh, it was not quite so 
bad as that, was it? 

Johnson. Not so bad as that I Yes, she lay as dead as 
a little log, in the chair there, but it w^as only tlie work of a 
minute and she was saved ! I must tell you, Mr. Lind, I 
have from former days a strong antipathy toward doctors ; 
they are all a pack of humbugs, but this one, I am forced 
to confess, is a fine man. And now, furthermore, I hear 
he has rescued Martin. 

Lind. Yes, but it was not him. 



DISTURBANCE ON THE FAR3I. 33 

Louisa. {Quickly). No, you are right Mr. Lind, it is 
Him that rules over life and death we should thank. 

Johnson. Right, my child I 

Louisa. I gave the contract to Erichson, and he prom- 
ised to see it to the station. 

Johnson. Oh, you're a smart girl ! You think of every- 
thing ! Well, Mr. Lind, now that I know Martin is out of 
danger, I will go to my men in the field. Louisa will see 
to your comfort, and despite all the disturbance we will get 
some supper, I suppose, Louisa? 

Louisa. Certainly, uncle. It will be ready when you 
return. 

Johnson. Very well. Adieu, then ! So long! {Exit 
out of gate in hackground) , 

Scene 23. 

Lind. Louisa. Later Johnson. Questruf. Brorson. 
Erichson and Anna. 

Lind. Well, now then, dear Louisa, I am formally in- 
troduced ; lamentably I Avas compelled to disown my suc- 
cessful treatment of Martin. 

Louisa. You came very near disclosing yourself when 
uncle praised Dr. Brorson. 

I JND. Of course I am somewhat loath to transfer a suc- 
successful method of cure to another, but this time I did it 
willingly for your sake, Louisa. (During this reply they 
exit sloiuly left), (Erichson and Johnson enter through gate 
in hacJcground) . 

Johnson. Yes, John, I was vexed with you this morn- 
ing for having put that notice in the paper, but as everything 
has since turned out here, I can't but owe you thanks. 
(Presses his hand). But there is the doctor. How is Martin? 

Brorson. (Comes through gate near house). Much 
better, Mr. Johnson. There is no danger at all now. -Have 
you seen Lind? 

Johnson. Lind I He was here a short space since. Do 
you know him? He is a fine young man. There he comes I 
Both he and Louisa ! (Pointing out left.) 

QuESTRUP. (Comes in from background) . Well, here is 
quite a gathering. How do you do, Erichson, how goes it? 



34 DISTURBANCE ON THE FARM. 

How do you do, Brorson, have you come into the country 
to-day, too? (Shakes hands tcith both), 

(Lind and Louisa enter slowly from left,^ 

QuESTRUP. Sees Lind and Louisa^ turns hastily to John- 
son and luhispers) . AVhy, there goes the doctor talking with 
Louisa. 

Johnson. (Also whisperiiKj) . Oh, you're a blockhead! 
That is Candidatus Lind, an old acquaintance ! However, 
now I will have that affair cleared up ! (Aloud), Louisa, 
may I have a few words with you? (Goes up left front,) 

Louisa. Yes, uncle ! (Follows him) , 

(Brorson and Lind talk low together). (Questrup con- 
verses tvith Erichson) , 

Johnson. (Aside to Louisa), See here, my child, tell 
me now candidly, you needn't be in the least afraid, I shall 
not be angry, tell me, are you engaged to the doctor? Ques- 
trup told me that 

Louisa. (Confused). Yes, uncle I But please don't be 
angry with me ! We are old acquaintances from Bergen. 

Johnson. Well, Louisa, it is all very good, but it does 
seem to me that you might have dropped a word to me 
about it. Did you not know me ? 

Louisa. Precisely because I did know you, dear, blessed 
uncle, I hesitated. Your antipathy toward physicians — 
this morning you said that 

Johnson. H'm ! Yes, you are right, my pet, but I 
didn't know then that you — vvell — (turns to the others). See 
here, my friends, Louisa has just imparted a little secret to 
me, and at the same time mentioned that I cherished an an- 
tipathy toward the medical fraternity. I would only declare 
that after becoming acquainted Avitli you. Dr. Brorson, I 
shall have to say : No rule Avithout an exception I You're a 
tine man in all respects. I know you have something to 
say to me — some favor to ask ? 

Brorson. Very truly I have, Mr. Johnson, and it is at 
present in your power to make me exceedingly happy. 

Erichson. And you can rest assured, Johnson, this man 
is not a humbug. He comes of a highly respectable Nor- 
wegian family in my native town, and has the best reputa- 
tion from the University of Christiania. 

Johnson. I have your word for it. John, and what I 



DISTURBANCE OX THE FARM. 35 

have witnessed with my own eyes, so I shall not hesitate — 
(catches Brorson's hand and leads him up to Louisa). Take 
her, Dr. Brorson, and make her happy ! 
. Louisa. (Runs up to Lind), Uncle, it is a mistake ! 

LiND. (Hurrying toivard Louisa.) What? 

QuESTRUP. (Aside ^ ruhhing his hands) . Here's the scan- 
dal ! And a prominent one, too ! 

Brorson. Mr. Johnson, I am deeply moved ; how flat- 
tering soever your offer in every respect is, I am still obliged 
to renounce it. (Sighs). I am married, and — I am not a 
Mormon ! 

Johnson. (Gazes astonished on cdl) . What pesky non- 
sense is all this, anyway? 

QuESTRUP. (Slaps him on the shoulder). Now, then, 
old fellow, was I right? 

Johnson. Shut up, you blockhead ! 

Louisa. Dear uncle, it is Lind to — to whom I am en- 
gaged. 

Johnson. (Angrily to Questrup) . But it was you, fool- 
ish, who said that Louisa kissed the doctor ! You're a fine 
fellow for making confusion ! 

Questrup. (Angry). I have only spoken the truth I 
(Points to Lind) . There stands the doctor that kissed 
her! Eh? 

Johnson. But you are completely — conclusively mad, 
man ! He is not a doctor ! (Laughs) . He sees a doctor in 
almost everybody ! ha ! ha ! ha ! 

Questrup. 1 Then he is not a doctor ! 

Brorson. j Is Lind not a doctor? 

Anna. (Enters through gate near house^ and goes up to 
Lind). Mr. Doctor, Martin is very uneasy. 

Lind. What is it? • 

Anna. He wants food ! 

Lind. Do you call that serious ? Tell him I will be there 
presently. (Anna exits). 

Questrup. (To Johnson). I say, do you believe me 
now? 

Johnson. I scarcely knoAv what to think or say, but one 
thing I do know, and that is that I am nearly tired of all 
this doctor-nonsense. — (turns to Lind) See here, sir, are 
you a hona fide doctor? 



36 BISTURBAXCE OX THE FARM. 

LiXD. No, sir ! 

QuESTRUP. I Now he's lying right to vour face ! 

Louisa. j But really, Lind I 

Johnson. (Goes up and doivn ^vhistUng) . 

Lind. (To Johnson), May I explain it all to you? 

Johnson. {Sarcastically) . Yes, if you will have the 
goodness, I shall be extraordinarily grateful. 

Lind. You see, I came here to seek a location as physi- 
cian 

Johnson. Yes, but good gracious, sir, you are not a 
doctor I Did you suppose we wanted a humbug? 

Lind. Not at all, for I am a r ecj id ar physician ! 

Johnson. {Seizes his head between both hands), Bum- 
melnm ! Bum — m I The fellow is mad I Stark, raving mad ! 

Lind. You don't allow me to finish, Mr. Johnson I I 
found your neice here {takes Louisa^ s hand) my old flame 
from Bergen, and — when I discovered you nourished an an- 
tipathy toward my profession, I decided to conceal the fact 
of my being a physician. Now you most excuse the little 
mystification, Mr. Johnson. ^^Bona fide doctor^'' as you 
inquired of me if I was, I really am not. In Denmark 1 
have no right to say I am a doctor. If asked I mmt answer 
no, for I am only candidcdns medicince — in short, a pbysi- 
cian ! To be called ''doctor" in that country, one must com- 
pose, and before the university professors, defend, an original 
scientific treatise. If this is done successfully the title of 
'-^doctor medicince' is conferred. So, because of your an- 
tipathy, for Louisa's sake, I made use of the subterfuge — as 
I had a right to do — and declared I was not a doctor ! And 
again, Mr. Johnson, {smiling) I am not a doctor I I have 
only spoken the truth I 

Johnson. {Provoked). Oh 

Louisa. Uncle, it was Lind that cured Martin I 

Johnson. H'm I — Yes, you're a fine pair of birds I Then 
you put your two love-sick heads together so as to delude 
the old man ! I — I will learn — {takes Louisa's hand) well, 
give the doctor — no — I would say — candidaticus medicinicus 
— a kiss, but don't let Questrup see you ! 

Louisa. {Falls cd)oid Johnson's neck) Oh, you dear, 
blessed uncle ! {kisses him) No you shall have the kiss ! 

Lind. {Takes Jolt n son's hand). Thank you, father! 



« DISTURBANCE ON THE FARM. 37 

For thus I may call you in future, may I not? My hearty 
thanks ! 

Johnson. Father-in-law ! ha ! ha ! ha ! But how com- 
ical it sounds, Louisa ! But nowyou two lovers can thank him 
there (points to Questr up) because everything went so smooth- 
ly. Had he not whispered in my ear you might have plodded 
along a great while without knowing that uncle's mind was 
favorable. (To Qicestrup^ luho breaks a ivalking stick over 
his knee) , Well, well, must my stick suffer for it now? 
Well, old fellow, that suit you didn't commence success- 
fully, eh? 

QuESTRUP. (Angry) . If you suppose I am going to 
stand here as a mark for your witticism, then — (buttons his 
coat and throios the broken stick to both sides). 

Johnson. (Laughs), P'shaw, old fellow ! What did 
you want to put your nose between for, anyway ? 

LiND. But if Questrup has helped me along it is but fair 
I should reciprocate. Mr. Johnson, give him your daughter, 
I know he is only waiting for your consent. 

Johnson. What, if you please? My daughter! Bursts 
into laughter) . I have no daughters ! I have never been 
married ! ha ! ha ! ha ! 

Questrup. (Shaking ivith anger). May I beg you, Mr. 
Lind, that — if — I shall bring one action against you after 
the 

Lind. Didn't you say yourself you was going to ask her 
to-night — and — 

Johnson. (Laughing) , It was Louisa he proposed to ! 
ha ! ha ! ha ! 

Lind. Louisa? Were you insane ? 

Questrup. Yes, I was insane ! I was an ape — a beast 
— a — block-head — fool ! I was all that I have been called 
here to-day, but — (starts to leave), 

Johnson. (Takes hold of him by the shoulder). Stop, 
old fellow ! So far and no further ! You are an old friend, 
and you must always remain such ; but we three-and-sixty- 
year fellows must not think too much of the young girls ! 
Cast such notions out of your mind, and leave it to the young 
people to — faint (pats Louisa's cheek) of mefe love. 

Louisa. Oh, fie, uncle ! 

Krichson. (Who has been ivhispering with Brorson), 



38 



DISTURBANCE OX THE FARM. 



But, see here, Johnson, which of the two doctors do you 
intend should have the place, for now I suppose Brorson has 
lost favor with you ? 

Johnson. Do you think so, John? No, now everything 
is in his favor ! Your doctor shall have the situation, and 
my candidaticus medicmicus I will soon transform into a 
quite passable farmer. Eh, sonny? 

LiND. As you wish, father! I am so happy now that 
I am ready to consent to anything, so as to be allowed to 
remain with my Louisa ! I can at least always assist Dr. 
Brorson in his practice on the farm. 

Brorson. Then we two can honestly declare that we 
had luck on our trip to Wisconsin ! 



LlND. 



Johnson. 



LlND. 

Johnson. 
All. 



Johnson. 



QUESTRUP. 



All. 



Closing Song. 

We in our path Fortuna met, 

She faithful was beyond all measure ! 

And brought us where we both could get 
Good practice, and one find his treasure ! 

And you was honored, please to guess 

One firm condition I've at heart. 
You {slaps Lind on shoulder) on the farm 

remain must 

Yes ! 

From you, Louisa, I'll not part. 

Yes, , upon the farm will stay, 
And throw the plaster-pills away. 

( To Questrup) And listen now, my good old friend, 
Let us once more be reconciled ! 
My antipathy I gave the wind, 

And you from love should be exiled ! 

Yes, I will ne'er propose again ! 

So bitter was my last sad potion. 
That you may call me " Nick," my friend, 

If e'er I get one more such notion. 

Yes. y°^ '"^y call "^*= " Nick," ™y friend. 
' we will him ' our 

If e'er i ° . one more such notion, 
he gets 



DISTURBANCE ON THE FARM. 39 

LiND. Conducts Louisa up to front of stage at center. 
To close up with you will allow — 

My sweetheart to present you here; 
She has a word to say, I vow, 

Which will this night to us endear ! 

Louisa (^Bowing to audience.) 

Kind friends, I only wish to say : 

Be not as critics too severe ! 
But some applause, I fondly pray. 

Send forth to greet the listening ear I 

(^All in semi-circle.) 
All. Yes, some applause, we fondly pray. 

You will send forth to greet the ear I 

Curtain , 



I 



Press of C. B. Fisk & Co., Palmer, Mass. 



$ 



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